Too Clever By Half

The easiest way out is to claim that he was misquoted by some rookie reporter. Then again, even when a journalist quoted directly from the official handout, she can end up with a sh*t load of trouble when horrible people are involved. But that's another story.

Our regional general manager was relieved to be posted to Singapore, after an unpleasant 3 years in Manila. A man with a short fuse - his face actually glows crimson when angry - his favourite peeve is about the time he received a letter from his bank in downtown Makati, informing him the check book he requested was ready for collection.

After braving the nightmarish traffic, he made his way to the bank counter, and presented the notification letter. The clerk took one quick look, made a cursory enquiry, and told him his new check book was not ready. Near fuming, he kept his cool, and jabbed his trembling finger at the printed copy clearly stating otherwise. Equally cool, the Filipina re-read the text: "Yes, Mr Hancock, the letter says the check book is ready for collection, but it does not say when."

We don't know much about the bank clerk, whether she had a qualification from a degree mill, or was a Senior Wrangler at Cambridge and graduated with first class honours in mathematics. But as Forrest Gump's mom so eloquently put it, stupid is as stupid does.